Embracing Human Wiring: Why Are Girls More Chatty & Thinky?

How Our Evolution Shapes Who We Are and Why It’s Important for a More Inclusive Society

How Our Evolution Shapes Who We Are and Why It’s Important for a More Inclusive Society

Back in prehistoric times, hunting was generally done by the boys, but multitasking? That was all her. When it comes to the age-old debate of who’s more mentally (and verbally) chatty, men or women, it’s scientifically clear that women come out on top.

A study published in the journal Science in 2007 found that women spoke an average of 16,000 words per day, while men spoke an average of 12,000 words per day. Of course there is a lot of variation among individuals and this should not be considered as a hard and fast rule.

But why is it that those of us with more estrogen seem to have busier brains and language patterns? Well, let’s take a trip back in time to the days of early humans — the proverbial cavemen (and cavewomen, of course).

Back then, our DNA had us fully programmed for primitive tribe survival.

Our Amygdala controlled and still controls the game of life

The Amygdala, a small almond-shaped structure located in the temporal lobe of the brain, has been a critical player in our survival since the days of our prehistoric ancestors. This ancient part of the brain, responsible for the fight or flight response, has not evolved much over time and still plays a fundamental role in our ability to quickly respond to potential dangers.

The Amygdala is not the rational part of the brain but acts on instinct, allowing us to react swiftly in life-threatening situations. This survival mechanism has kept our species going throughout history and continues to operate in our daily life now.

Survival of the tribe (from the Amydala’s point of view) was why males needed to be laser focused, and physically stronger with the ability to track and kill large animals. On the other hand, females had the equally crucial role of protecting the offspring and the home front. This meant keeping an eye out for danger, such as bears and other predators who might try to eat the kids, as well as making sure the fire didn’t go out.

Before I proceed (and rub anyone the wrong way) I need to say this: As a person who has experienced sexism, I don’t like to stereotype gender roles and I think it’s wonderful that we are embracing our wider “earth family”including anyone who identifies with a gender different from what they were assigned at birth. That said, we are all human, and evolution gave us hormones variance and brain functionality that create biases, as a survival mechanism.

Even though most of us don’t have bears lurking around our homes like we used to, or have to hunt for food out on the prairies, we still have much of our human species programming hard-wired in.

Again this is why the male side of us needs to be able to focus predominantly on one task at a time in order to be successful, while another needs to be able to multitask in order to keep the tribe safe. Evolutionary logic!

How our DNA still drives us, there’s nothing to feel ashamed of

Fast forward to present day, and it’s scientifically clear that this division of labor has had a lasting impact on the way men and women communicate. Men for the most part are still wired to focus on one task at a time, while women are wired to multitask and keep an eye on everything at once.

If you’ve ever asked your guy to spot something new about your appearance they might take a moment to shift focus and make the “correct” observation.

This is why men are more likely to be “in the zone” when working on a project or playing a game, while women are more likely to be chatting with friends, checking their phone, and keeping an eye on the kids all at the same time.

So, the next time you find yourself wondering why women talk more than men, just remember: it’s all thanks to our hunter gatherer ancestors and the brain you inherited from them.

And come on, let’s be honest, we all know that cavemen were not known for their eloquence, so it’s a good thing the women were doing most of the talking! Sorry guys hehe.

Jokes aside; the early division of labor has had a lasting impact on the way men and women communicate historically leading up to today.

This division of labor can also be observed in modern societies, where men tend to be overrepresented in fields that require a lot of focus and concentration, such as science and technology, while women tend to be overrepresented in fields that require multitasking, such as education and healthcare. Thankfully this is changing rapidly as we evolve to suit suit our modern society.

It’s also important to note that while this division may have had an impact on the way genders communicate, it doesn’t mean that all men are less talkative than women, or that all women are more talkative than men or less laser focused. In fact, there is a lot of variation, and many of us defy these stereotypes. Me included.

In Summary

Our DNA is the blueprint of who we are, and we can’t deny that it influences our behavior, habits, and thought processes. From our caveman or desert dwelling ancestors, who relied on hunting and gathering for survival, to present day, where we may have different, shared responsibilities and activities, our DNA continues to play a role in shaping our actions and decisions.

Understanding how our evolutionary processes still drive us can help us make sense of and accept our behaviors and make conscious decisions about how we want to live our lives.

Instead of giving credit to one gender over others, we can recognize and understand how we are all wired to play unique and valuable roles in society.

Our biology, genetics, and history have all played a part in shaping who we are, and it is important to acknowledge and appreciate the diverse ways in which we contribute.

By embracing and understanding how we are wired, we can better understand ourselves and others, and work towards creating a more inclusive and equitable society.

So, Let’s talk!

Like this article? Subscribe to be notified when I publish.

Get access to unlimited stories like this one and support your favorite writers with a Medium membership for only $5/month. Sign up with this link and I’ll earn a small commission. Thanks 🙂